I went along with being made to feel like I was really lucky for being granted entry when really I just wanted to tell her to shove it up her bum.
This month, meet Van Gogh, Imagine at the Southbank Centre children’s festival and explore a Fairy Tale town at Discover.
Get festive af this month with everything from carol concerts to Christmas lights and grottoes to gingerbread metropolises.
I wanna dance with my kid – and when I say dance I mean wobble around awkwardly trying to avoid eye contact incase someone senses my discomfort.
This month’s picks include Kinska’s ceramic universe, Olafur Eliasson’s immersive world and a colourful family day at the Barbican.
This month’s highlights include secret gardens, colourful pavilions, a rooftop rave and womb-inspired theatre.
This month, soak up some culture with tot-friendly LDF pop-ups, vintage toy and video-game exhibitions, and storytelling in the clouds.
From child-led playgroups to parent-focused gigs; lively mummy-and-me yoga classes to calm, childcare-inclusive mothers’ retreats – we give you the definitive, tried-and-tested top 100 activities for little Londoners and their adults.
The shop floor might not scream “bring forth the urchin”, but the beautiful kids’ products make it a tempting prospect for parents.
I was picturing a room full of sponges with a couple of people in costumes bouncing around helping the babies climb into buckets.